Hey and welcome back to feed me. Turo fitness podcast today, we are talking about something everyone struggles with at some point, how to stay consistent when motivation runs out. So it's easy to start something when you are excited, but what happens when that excitement fades? So this is a question. What I got several times, actually this week in my VMs, in my Instagram, and people were asking me tips, what to do when I'm not feeling motivated, like in most cases, people have started, well, maybe it was in January, maybe it was in February, but now we are beginning of March, when this episode is coming out, and that motivation is not there anymore. And this is one of the hardest truths to understand that motivation it it is only matter of time before you are running out of it. So you will not feel motivated every single day. There is not single person in whole world who is feeling motivated every single day. And in this episode, we are going to break down, why motivation is actually unreliable, and what, what to rely on instead, and the worst ways to stay consistent that actually make things lot harder, and why willpower and extreme challenges don't work in long term. And then I'm going to provide you practical strategies to keep showing up even when you don't feel like it. So let's get into it and go forward with the recording. So Alright, so let's start with that hard truth, so that motivation is unreliable, so it's as you probably have learned from your own experience, that motivation comes and goes. Some days you wake up feeling ready to conquer the world, and you are motivated, excited to do your workout, eat healthier, and then other days, you just want to lay on the couch and scroll your phone, and if you only take action when you feel like it, your progress will always be inconsistent. What is the key here is to stop relying on motivation and start relying on habits. So consistency comes from systems, routines and discipline, not just from feeling inspired. And this is a great exam example. I use my own example. What I used to be. I have been always. I was from my background. As you probably know, I'm I was a professional athlete, and there was no such a thing than motivation. Or I'm most of today's like, I didn't, I was just working out because I had to. That was, that was a kind of thing, what as an athlete, you have to do if you want to perform, because that goal was there to become better ice cookie player and and you know that there is some work to do, and if I didn't feel it feel like doing the work. Of course there were days that I didn't do it, but the most of the days that bigger goal was there greater than than, actually the pain of doing that, getting that work done. But that is, that is not an I when I retired my professional career, and it hit really hard like now, suddenly I didn't have to work out anymore. And it took me 10 years. I was 10 years inconsistently and basically just doing things that I enjoy doing and thinking that I will, I will do those. I will work out just what I like or I was I had to do things like that. I naturally didn't enjoy that much, like a strength training and and that was something that I have I never enjoyed, never when I was playing professionally. Even nowadays, I'm not enjoying to doing it, but I know, on the other hand, that it's the one way of exercise that I must do to be able to feel in long term as good as I do now. And to key how I have been able to do it, I'm going to provide my own strategies and strategies that are actually approved and backed up by science. So but let's get started with the worst ways to stay consistent. So you should definitely try to avoid this. And here are also couple of my personal examples, as I have been trying several of these things and unfortunately failed in many of these so you don't need to fail as I did in the past and avoid these mistakes. So if you have ever tried these kind of things and failed, it's not your fault. These methods are setting up you for the burnout and for quitting, and that is not a matter of if it happens. It's matter of time. So people often think that they when they are using that kind of willpower method that you think that I just need to be stronger, I need more discipline. But willpower is like a battery. It drains throughout the day, so you can't rely on it forever. So instead of forcing yourself to be kind of more disciplined, make things easier for yourself. So it's, for example, if you struggle to work out in the evening, try to schedule your workouts in the morning when that disease synthetic is low. So think that willpower is that there is certain amount of willpower what we have, and we use it throughout the day, like it starts in the morning. Okay, you might have built already some habits, like brushing your teeth in the morning, brushing your teeth in the day. You don't think those things. You get up, you start your routine, and there is not much that will power fatigue, what you need. But then if you are you have to make, then you have already next decisions, what clothes you are going to wear, how you are going to get into work. And some of these decisions like you, when you are if you are driving to your working place, you jump into your car, you stop on a red light. Those are all resistance, which are kind of automatic already. So you don't need much willpower on doing those things. But in when you start to say that I need to actually do my workout, and if you haven't built that habit, that it's easy for you, you will struggle. It will be it's a lot of real power, what you will be needing to do that. But this is, this is why that will power method. It's, it's setting you into a failure, because it's only matter of time. It's certain amount of real power, and what you have each day, and all those decisions they take. If you have a work where you have to make several decisions per day, that trains your willpower. So instead, if you have those habits, like for me, I used to think like that, it's now when the weather is nice, I want to go i i Don't struggle to do my workout. It feels good to do workout, but if I rely on willpower and the way how I feel. I tried it for 10 years. I was never consistent. It was often the cycle was maybe for a month, not even month, couple weeks. And then something happened. It was a busy period of work or something in personal life. I was like, Okay, I gotta keep I'm going to skip this week. But that and that often that planned one week break, or when I talked myself out of it, kind of starting that action. It Was that planned planned break. It was never just a week. It was often a lot longer than only that planned one week, two week break. And now I just rely on my habits. And I'm going to talk little bit later more about those things how to do. And second thing, what I would avoid in any price is extreme challenges, like my own example, is that at this time, it's it's here, it's a carnival time and very common, like a fasting time. And challenges like I did this like and I know that here in Italy, especially area where I live, so many people are going like that. They are going to be 40 days without sugar, without alcohol, without everything. And that is, that is that was, at least for me, that was the worst way, because what you are actually relying. You are relying on your willpower, and if everything goes well, you are able to do that 3040, days challenge without sucro. And most likely, I'm not saying that I felt great doing it. That was you feel like that how it's doing. So it's not bad to experiment those things. But if you think that you are going to get some amazing results by doing this kind of challenges. It's not going to happen, to be honest, it's you will feel most likely better for the first for the next 3040, days, or how long you can take it this time. But then after that, what you have, if you don't have any backup plan how to move away from those challenges, because it's often those kind of extreme challenges, cutting completely everything out. It's only matter of time. You are counting days that now I have I have done 28 days. I have 12 more to go, and then when the day is there, you have accomplished your challenge. You are like that. Now I'm done. Now I can eat and do things what I actually want to do. And that is, that is what you learn. What I learn from these challenges is just that I have discipline. I have really power, but there is nothing what what you came in, if you look like in here, from that challenge, when I did it, or six months after that challenge, did I learn something? No, did I gain some visible results? Did I feel amazingly better? No, did I gain some amazing results for the first days or for within that month, absolutely. But in the long term, if I think in the long term, like 612, months, that I didn't gain anything, that all results I got, they were as soon as they came. They were all almost come. And it's not that I try to even talk myself out of it and thinking like that. Okay, this is a, this is a great challenge that maybe I will find out the way how to actually stick with the plan reduce little bit. And maybe it worked for for a while, but it's, it was never a solution that actually helped me to gain something or learn habits that help me in in a lifelong challenge, because this fitness thing, this is not the just some race or challenge. It's a lifelong journey. There is no deadline. There is no deadline when you are done, when it's done, even you might have some goal weight or whatever, but then even you reach those goals, which are amazing goals, but then you are like, how long you are happy? You are happy, maybe for a minute, maybe for a day, maybe for a week. But then you are like that, what is next? What is next? What I'm going to do now, when this challenge is over, and that that kind of challenges, they are not helping. So if you have ever done this kind of no super challenges or something similar, they, of course, they in the beginning, they feel very exciting at the first, and especially when you are able to do it, but often then later on, they lead the pinching, guilt and burnout. So when you are, when you are, then finally, you can't take it anymore. Your willpower is already gone, and you are like that. Now, what is the point? I'm not going to make it anyway. And then you are ending up pinching, feeling guilty about it. And then you say, you tell to yourself that I will start over, maybe it's next Monday, maybe it's next week, maybe it's next month, but that that leads, ultimately only to burnout. So instead of that all or nothing thinking, try some small, sustainable changes that fit into your life in long term. And third thing, what I would avoid, and what is the huge mistake, is waiting for the perfect time. So we like to talk ourselves out of starting something. What we ultimately know that we should get started. But often what I hear from clients that I will start when the work slows down. I will start when I have finished my holiday. I will start when Christmas time is over. I will get back on track when life is less stressful and news news. If you didn't know it, I know that you probably know it, but there will never be a perfect time. You have to make progress, even in both perfect conditions. So And progress is not always that you are seeing amazing results, like I had this year, several clients, actually. I was very, very surprised that who started actually in December, and they were all thinking at that time, that is it now, because, you know, there is a Christmas coming and and a holiday season, that is it, the right time to start, because I probably I can't stick perfectly in my macros or calorie goals or my workouts, but this is not progress. Is not that you are doing everything perfectly. That is all or nothing mindset, and that progress is always if you compare yourself, for example, last year at the same time, like, let's let's talk about like, let's say, example, Christmas time, holiday season. So if last holiday season you gained two kilos of weight, and now this year, you are able to maintain or you gain only one kilo of weight. Obviously, that's not the perfect but it's progress that is not the best rate thing. But this is just the way to think how to get rid of that all or nothing thinking. So don't wait for the perfect time. So what then actually works? So here are a couple of strategies. My favorite strategy is to how to stay actually consistent. So these are very practical ways, and especially when the motivation is gone, and step number one is always focusing on identity, not just calls. So I little bit talked about it earlier, about my identity when I was an athlete. So So I wasn't I wasn't I, of course, I had a goals, but my identity was that I was an athlete. My goal was or I was athlete. And athletes are working out. So this is something, what I what I like to talk with my clients, especially who are struggling, like, if you are, if you have a coach, like losing fat or or I recently had a had a great talk with one of my long time clients said I like, who had a huge problems with the stress and perimenopause, and we changed kind of everything, and set different goals like and instead of focusing the number on the scale, which is very frustrating, if you work hard, you don't see results. Or at least you don't see as much results as you would like, or maybe in the past, you have seen some kind of success, but now there is no progress, or very little progress, and this is very frustrating. So if you move that like we did with Sarah, we started think that she's actually an athlete, even she's not, but or she went to workout, she had a goal in her mind. What was? We picked one of her favorite exercises and and see the only goal was to get as strong as possible in her favorite exercise, and that was a deadlift, and visit the call. Or she was at the time, that's, uh, around one month ago. We set the goal to like she was able to do with 50 kilos, five repetitions dead lift and visit the realistic goal to have 60 kilos, like 20% increase, I think, if my math is more or less correct, uh, increase of her strength and do five repetitions with the same weight, or with that, with the 60 kilo weight, so 10 kilos more. And actually today, when I'm recording this, it's three weeks. And since we started this goal, and she hit that already, now I was actually, originally, I was thinking it might take a bit longer. It might take two months or something, but she hit it in a within three weeks. And now, of course, as a side effect, she has become lot stronger. She already wrote that. Actually, she jumped on the scale even she didn't want to do it, but she have also lost weight. Stress is so much reduced. She's excited working out and not just working out for because you have to do it, or you have some weight loss goals or whatever, that you are trying to become healthier, but you are actually thinking like an athlete and that her identity is to become as strong as possible. So the only goal is to get stronger, and then when, when she's getting, like, imagine, this kind of results. Getting 20% increase in her strength means that she's gaining muscle mass. She's it's going to boost her metabolism. She will need lot more calories during today, without doing anything, and obviously feeling probably like a lot better than earlier. And these kind of shifts in your identity, it's, it's those are game changers, and especially for women who I work like in their 40s, 50s, focusing and starting to think to get as strong as possible, and shifting that focus or working out on towards some kind of goal. And often I like to empathize some kind of like performance based goal. What is? What is totally possible within your actions and not just thinking that I need to lose weight. Of course, that is, I understand the frustration that you have to lose weight, but when you focus on different things which are kind of leading to that same end results what you want, that is going to be a game changer, and that is going to get that frustration lot less and and when you think that identity, because often question, what I get is that, how I can change my identity? And it's instead of saying that I want to work out, say that I'm someone who moves every day or asking questions like that. What would person with your goals? Let's say healthy person would decide at this moment what I what healthy person would eat, what healthy person would do. Would healthy person skip a workout, say that I don't have time today? Or would that person with my goals say that I get at least started? So this kind of shifts in your identity and the way how you think, make actions feel automatic instead of forced. And then strategy number two is kind of that lowering that barrier to entry, so make things as easy as possible to get started. So I just got, actually today, message one, one of my other client Ingrid, and so that she knows that she needs to drink more water. She knows that she needs to start tracking her food, writing down into my nutrition app, all food she's eating, because that has been such a game changer and helping so much for her to become aware of what she's actually eating. And then, as she was telling that, but she don't know when she she, she have been talking herself out of doing it, but I said that the goal is here, also, it's kind of the perfectionist. What is there? And as that, what if you could do right now? What? There are two steps, what you could be doing, like, for example, Her goal was the challenge. What I gave for today was just to put six rubber bands into her water bottle, half liter water bottle, because her goal is to drink three liters of water. And I said, you don't need to get that call done. You don't need to accomplish that goal to drink three liters of water. But it all starts with detection, that you, at least you put those rubber bands so that it's visible and you know what to do. And if you think that, you need to get started with the tracking your food, if you what, what was your last meal? So her last meal was breakfast, as that you probably didn't wake everything up, but put as accurately as possible what you just had for your breakfast and you are done for today, you took action. It was not perfect, but it was action and and sitting those things, then next day, tomorrow is a new day, and once you get started something, it's so much easier to keep doing that thing, instead of talking yourself out of it and waiting that perfect time to get started. And now I'm measuring everything perfectly so. And this is, this is something like for myself, like when I think in the past, what I what I did with my workouts. I did workout when I felt motivated, and now, especially in winter time, I had a huge struggles with my motivation, especially with my strength training. So I didn't feel like because strength training is something I naturally don't enjoy and and I didn't like it was cold time I work out in my basement, there is no heating. And in the winter time, in months of December, January, it's so fucking cold there, and I just I tried to find every excuse what I could for myself to not get in there and not to get started. But I'm a person who promised to myself to get started two times per week. And obviously months of January, there were weeks that I just literally went there. I did one exercise, I did two exercises. Maybe I ended up doing 15 minutes, but it was never longer than 20 minutes my workouts and just basically showing up, just showing up, and doing that one exercise, and then I called it for a day, because I didn't have time. I didn't have motivation, but I kept consistent. Of course I did. I see amazing results. No, did I lose progress? Also not. But what makes it so much easier now we are in the million, billion of March now. Couple weeks ago, I was like, Okay, now I actually feel more motivated again. Motivation is back there, and now it's it was so much easier to start to add something for that routine, what I already had built, and now I'm doing my 3040, 50 minute workouts, two, three times per week, consistently for a month. So it's just overcoming those periods, over cutting overcoming those lumps of motivation, while staying consistent and telling yourself that I just get started, I just do five minutes. Because 90% of the time, at least for me, I will keep going even I talk myself just to get started. I, more often than not, I it's just only about that getting started. It's not about that actually doing that work, but it's only about getting started. So if you are someone who is struggling to eat healthy, so you could pre cut your vegetables, you could prepare your meals in advance, or keep healthy snacks visible. So those are all kind of things. What is like that? If you struggle with that, if you take you take couple minutes of time, if it could be on weekend, or someday when you have a little bit more time just prepare yourself. Plan ahead, because that is, ultimately, that is that is the key for all consistency. So then everything that you don't need, that willpower you have, everything is already prepared. So more often than even it's not working every time you are more likely to actually eat a bit healthier when everything is prepared in advance. So and then tip number three is kind of building those triggers and proteins. So I have been recently reading a couple of books of about building habits, and they both, they have a same method, and I, I'm big fan of believing it that building and dying your habits to something you already do. So for example, if you are you have to these kind of habits what I talked earlier, like hopefully brushing your teeth morning, maybe in the evening, and then, for example, after pressing your teeth in the morning, I do then squats or 10 push ups. So when you have that kind of routine, what you are already doing, or what I what I did when I that was a at the times when I was an athlete, I I was working in, in a normal, actually, very demanding work in a construction building some, uh houses and helping, helping people when I was younger, and I knew that I had to work out. But of course, I was exhausted after day after day, and I knew that if I just go home, if I lay down into the couch, I will not get up anymore. I will not do my workout. So I was doing it in this way that I had a rule that either I have to go right away to the gym after work before even going to home and get my workout done, or I I, when I when I came home, I had to before laying into couch, because that was the trigger for me that didn't work, was I knew that soon as I hit that point there in I will not get myself up anymore. But I just, I changed my workout clothes right away and started that action so those kind of more automatic you are less motivation you are going to need. And then Tip number four is kind of planning for the days you don't feel like it. So creating that kind of if thin plan. So this is often what I do when I, like, really can't get myself doing the work, or I have some injury. So what? Unfortunately, like, fortunately, it haven't happened lately too much but, and I hope it will stay that way, but if, for example, if I don't feel like working out, then I will at least go for a walk. So there is something like, what is kind of that harder thing, what is what you would ideally do? And then there is that kind of thin plan, easier plan, what you will do. Then instead, if you can do that first option, if I'm for example, other example, for a nutrition part, if I'm too tired to cook, then I will order a healthy option instead of Fast, fast food. So those are, those are kind of having that if then plan in a place, and that is, that is a game changer. So and then last one measure your actions, not just results. So if you only measure your success in the scale, you will get discouraged, you will feel unmotivated. But instead, if you are tracking things, you can control. So how many workouts you started, I would, I don't like to track how many workouts I completed, because my goal is never to complete my workout. It's to get started. And if I set the goal like I do it for myself every week, like that, I decide on Sunday looking my schedule how it looks like for upcoming week. And then if it if my schedule is realistically that busy, I don't, I don't have option to work out three times a week. Then I say that, okay, this week, I will start two times per week, and I will put those workouts into my schedule, into my calendar, and treat them as non negotiable events for myself. So it's like important meaning that there is, I'm not going to postpone it. I'm not going to do it's like a non negotiable event for myself, and that is 100 person under my control. It's in my calendar, it's there, and I just need to get started. I never need to finish it. Another thing, what? What is 100% under your control is to set, for example, goals like how many meals you prepared, or if it's it, could you could. You don't need to plan and prepare every single meal. But if you are new, just about to get started, I would start one, two, not more than three meals ahead, and starting with that, planning that, setting a goal that I will plan for Monday, evening, Wednesday evening and Thursday evening, because those are the times I struggle the most. So I'm planned. I'm prepared for those times when that things happens, and when you are measuring actions like how many times you drink water instead of soda, or how much water you are able to drink, if you are using tricks like you would have, you could set alarm to your phone using that rubber band example, what I used, what which is, By the way, one of my favorite strategies, but just measuring those actions, how many steps you are able to take, how how many times you are going for a walk? It don't have to be 30 minute walk or there is never a perfect number. It's just in your head. It's more. I would like to, I like to set these kind of goals. How many times I started action? Never setting yourself that kind of goal that you need to complete some amount of exercise, but just simply getting started. So at the end of the day, staying consistent is not about willpower and is not about extreme challenges. It's about building habits that fit into your life. It's making it easier to show up, even when you don't feel like it, and focusing on long term identity change, not just short short term motivation go. So here is your challenge. Pick one small change. I talk now many things in this episode, but just don't try to do everything. Pick just one small change and commit to do it this week. I would love to hear what you choose. So I'm I love to hear your thoughts, your ideas, and so DM me on my instagram at personal trainer, underline Turo and tell me what small habit you are focusing on. Because ultimately, when you keep yourself accountable, not just listening and that it's going in from other year and away from other year. So let me be your accountable partner. Right to my DM in my Instagram, what you are committing to do this time. So you have wrote it. You have promised it for someone else than just yourself, because of more often than not, if you promise just something for yourself, without that external motivation or external accountability, you are not going to do it. But once you have that accountability, outside accountability, you are writing. You are you could make social media post, I'm committing to do this and this, and then showing actually how you do it, but you could be just writing me in my Instagram, telling me what small habit sense you are focusing on. And if you found this episode helpful, do me a favor. Subscribe, share it with your friend and leave a review. And thank you, by the way for all those who have left already written review in iTunes or Spotify, they are helping, so much for more people to find this podcast, so thank you for listening and see you in the next episode.