Making Progress Without Relying on Motivation

Hey, and welcome to this fitment to a fitness Podcast. Today I'm talking about how to make progress without relying on motivation. But before going into the topic, I want to say real quickly what is going on. And I will share a couple of weeks in vacation being in all inclusive hotels and was actually with with an Italian ice hockey national team, doing a five day camp and as want to share a little bit what I saw out there, and what How was the experience and how it can actually help you. So I was we were just a vacation this week, we planned with my wife, or him for vacation for two weeks, but at last moment came over from his Italian National Ice hockey team to be their strength and conditioning coach, so I couldn't avoid that opportunity. And I absolutely loved it. I was with them. Having a possibility to work with the world class coaches also head coaches and Mike Keenan, who is with a Stanley Cup champion legend in NHL, the best ice hockey league in the world and, and experience working with that kind of person getting looking how they are doing, how they're doing coaching, what they're doing, was just a great experience for me, not only personally but to see what actually what is like, what kind of secrets they are, what kind of methods they are using, and finding this thing, what are those, like what the most successful coaches like they have, obviously, they have the knowledge, but they keep things very simple. So it's not that goes like they used to say a lot like the simpler it is more effective. He's so kind of like that, less is more. And this is when I'm more I think about it in my coaching. For my, for example, my most successful clients, like more simpler to plan is more effective and better results you are getting so because there is like a, it's kind of a symptom with the causes, like I'm guilty with that myself too, like that you have probably so much knowledge and that you want to kind of show your, what you're able to do what you are knowing and, and kind of trying to impress people with your knowledge and, and but it's not, it's not the most successful setup like that. Even Even, like the best results from the best clients is that what I get is that just keep things simple, like do the most efficient things do them consistently and, and results aren't there it will be only a matter of time. Like if you start to use too complicated, too difficult things it's that's the best way to get overwhelmed and how most people are responding when you are getting overwhelmed, you end up doing nothing and that is like the moment when your brain is telling that I'm not going to do anything. And this is this was something what I truly learned from the best coaches like it's not it's very simple like because there's obviously fitness is probably right for me to pretty high quality. In my like priority lists are not quality but priority in my priority list like I make sure that you know I live and breathe fitness and health but for most people there are a lot of other more important tasks like you have your job you have family kids everything like that there's so much going on in your life that fitness is somewhere there like maybe you know priority list list on place like 50 or something and for me maybe it's number three after family and home health and everything so so it really matters how like the what kind of results you're going to get simply are usually simpler to plan is better results you will get because you are able to stick them with the dose plans consistently. And that was one thing I was a little bit related for these like we were with my wife in vacation for was a priest in Greece small island called Zakynthos I'm not sure if I pronounced it right but anyways, we were in all inclusive hotel land and I love the like I don't compare myself hardly ever beat somebody else but I love to see I love to look what kind of like just because I somehow I can get rid of my I kind of think my work always some somehow but I am too and I was just looking like what to kind of people what they were eating when they were going to choose meals and I was just looking like that. How people what they were deciding to eat how they were And like obviously, when everything is free, you can get as much alcohol as you want, you get salads, you have all kinds of options from, from warm Whole Foods, then you have like kind of more processed stuff with like rice and everything. And I'm not saying there's a right or wrong option to do it. But just just a few notes how what I realized is that at when I when I look at myself, and when my wife or some other like who looked relatively lean and looked relatively fit as there was a holdover, many, many people who were I saw that they were absolutely doing something because that is often like most of the people, they don't do anything like they don't work out. They don't do anything related to their fitness and, and when I was looking at those people who they were like, and myself, I always started like I was, I was eating honestly, everything I wanted, I had dessert every single day, I had alcohol on most days. But the difference was that it was like when I went to all English, of course, I know I'm kind of eater who loves to eat a lot. And I enjoy eating basically everything I can eat whatever somebody is bringing until it's a lot of food, I'm eating everything. And when I was going to food, but there are a few ways how I do it. Like I say, in the end, I didn't gain too much weight like little bit but that was expected to go in for like not doing any exercise in it was way too hard to do be even active and walking. And Swimming was not possible. So that was really needed like kind of relaxing holiday, but it was only four days. But that was even for me success as I'm, I'm a person who is barely never able to just lay down and do nothing. So that was the whole purpose of doing. But when it was going for menu going for dinner food, I always started with the big salad. So I will start with the I was always thinking like that, okay, there are a few things, I'm allowing myself to eat everything as much as I can eat. But I started with the big plate of Senate. So a lot of it's the pros salad, and then try to get some kind of lean proteins or so we had a, there was some very good feces, lean meat available. So I made sure that I had first dose. So first big salad, some sorts of protein and then took little time, like was waiting. And then after that went for everything I wanted. So in the end, I I didn't eat basically almost I tried to sometimes some french fries or something. But that was never, I never actually even wanted that. But all kinds of other stuff would I know that were probably delicious, but I didn't want I was kind of saving it for later. And then dessert. If I was I was taking every single day, but I was at the time, it was time to eat some kind of dessert, I was already so full that it was just a little bit so I didn't eat so much. And it was the same thing when I was going for breakfast, like most people like I'm person who loves to eat a lot at breakfast, but I always start with kind of most filling with less calories, making sure that having my protein so I have for example, as a breakfast, I tried to have a lot of fluids with some kind of yogurt like obviously I was increased so they had a very very tasty Greek yogurt with high protein. Then after that I tried to have some kind of IQ, it was Champa sometimes scrambled egg sometimes could take so some kind of source of protein. And only after that if I still wanted like I'm not the person who usually loves to eat in morning some kind of sweet stuff. But if there was something available, I want it I saved it in the end. So likely when you when I do it this way in which order I'm eating lightly, I'm going to eat very much less that kind of like high calorie stuff. What I probably wanted the most or didn't want the most but when I leave it in the end, I'm already so full at the time so I'm not feeling I'm not able to eat too much of it when I and when I say somebody else you know you if you start with that sweets that first you are so hungry and then you end up eating dinner a lot and then maybe you can do your thought that maybe able to eat some something else to add like some eggs or something else but if you eat first those sweet stuff, it's it's that order of food, it matters so rather it says that just the takeaway from this is that if you start with kind of most feeling, making sure you drink a lot of water. You are going to feel so much fuller already before you come to the point when you actually are thinking like that. What Wow, what else you should be eating. So these were like just kind of small things what I did, and I was I was honestly I was eating so much, and what it's as when you are not home, you are not you are eating something that you're not used to, you want to taste kind of everything. So I was I was feeling almost discussed the amount of iOS eating and when I came back home, I was waiting myself my wife said that I'm for sure I have gained five kilos of weight. But I think it was only one or two kilos, not even that and that I still just got back on track did my went back for my normal routine and it took like a couple of days and all gained weight was cancel, there is nothing you need to do. It's if it's only for a couple of days, you are not able to eat that much that weight gain is like the body's preventing you is for most cases, who would I say that if you are, you're coming you're thinking before vacation after vacation that you need to kind of punish yourself with something or you start to skip meals which is which are again leading to repeating that cycle of overeating over and over again. So So these kinds of small habits when you just allow it in so it and don't think if you are scared of jumping on the scale, scared of seeing that number, how much is that what kind of number that message is going to give you don't do it for a couple of days, just get back on track, and somebody week after. So you are not, you're not getting that panic, that push you know, if you didn't, if you don't honestly, if you don't gain any weight that vacation, probably you didn't enjoy it with full as much as you could sell. So that's totally normal and part of things. So it's really like a few days, doesn't make anything make it's only I guess, you know, if you are doing everything perfectly for a week, you won't see a lot of progress. But it works also an oversight. So even doesn't matter what you are doing for a week or something, you are not losing your properties either. So, but today's topic is how to make progress on without relying on motivation. So motivation is something it's emotion, it's kind of fickle friend, like it comes and goes. If you are always waiting for it, you might be waiting forever. So I know when most of the people I talk like they are like, No, I'm not motivated, I feel like you know, maybe it's coming. And that is that is those people if you are waiting to get motivated, or if you quit, every time you feel unmotivated, you will never be able to see enough progress. So so it's it's not only in fitness, it's any area of life. It's not motivation, it's consistency. I just posted in my Instagram, the best example one of my friend, Joshua, who turned by the way, 40 this week, and we have been working two years together. And the best part of his story, like if you if you look to my Instagram or Tiktok, I posted some pictures about him. It's not some amazing progress. But what is amazing in this progress is that he didn't sense any amount what he was doing. So he was already working out two times a week before we started to work. So he didn't add any amount of exercise. He was we were just working smarter at SAS thing to plan, we will surely you're preventing him to make progress. Like he was thinking that if I can't hit the gym, I won't do anything. And then we change that kind of mindset that there's always something I get in with him past two years, he has had, unfortunately, some injuries from two to two shoulder injuries, and that he couldn't work out he couldn't work out when his soldiers, but there was always like something, something else he could do not only strength wise, but if you can do any strength training, if you're not allowed to do for example, work on your soldiers, you can probably work most part of your legs with exercises that are not impacting on your shoulder. Or you can do mobility work, what is helping you to prevent injuries later on. Or you can walk so there's always something you can do and and sensing this kind of attitude, aiming for that I can I'm not allowed because it's it's so easy to tell to yourself that, you know, I'm Dr. protonated do not exercise. So, ah, I'm so relieved that I don't need to do anything. I'm not allowed to do anything. But if you like I love to use always, instead of ask yourself, if I'm not able to do this, what I'm able to do and if you're not able to do anything if you have to lay you still have to eat so maybe you can break Practice some kind of skills of mindful eating, or some other like learning from foods that you're eating on regular basis. There's always something and like I said earlier, when you are keeping it simple, focusing, one, maybe two, maximum three things at a time. That's the way how you are building those habits. So and when you are building habits, you become more consistent. And like Joshua, now, in two years, without syncing without adding any things like it's just focusing on few things like eating, making sure to eat enough protein, making sure to have one to two fruits per day to have some kind of fiber source of fiber, which those are two most important things. He count calories at some point. So he learned how to what the amount of foods he's eating on regular basis, but he didn't track every single calorie all the time. But obviously, it's a tool would probably you should, at some point, use for at least for a little bit to learn what you're eating on a daily basis. And then if you focus on when you know, like, what you are eating on a daily basis, on most days, then most days are covered. And when you have enough protein, you won't be hungry, you won't have sweet dreams. And then with the same thing with the workouts, if you are able to if you are someone who know that would ideally broke out four times a week, but for some reason, you know, like a suitcase, you have a very demanding job, having a good kids, family doctor, and so on a lot of things going on in life, and realistically, at this point of his life more than two times a week is not realistically possible. So you make most out of that time, what you have, when you have an extra plan what you are following, making sure that you do kind of the most valuable things, most valuable exercises with the time you have available. And you are surprised like in just how much progress like obviously, it's not going to be some eight week amazing transformation, what you probably see in social media, but if you put that work, you put that consistency in two years, time is passing so fast that he like he's he's so amazed with his progress within these two years. And if you look those pictures from my, my Instagram or somewhere, like it's amazing amount of strength he has gained, he have lost only 10 pounds of weight, but his inches from his waist, like to say amazing, huge I don't remember, like it's a three, four incease what he have lost from this race. So he had lost a lot of fat while gaining some kind of muscle. So this is this is just an example what you can eat don't have to be perfect until it's consistent. So So what is what is the what is the easiest way if you really are not motivated. So it's, it's those habits, what you are doing every single day. And I have been talking, I'm a big believer of these small habits, which doesn't even feel that you are changing something. So it's really like, most people they think like I'm guilty for that myself also that it's kind of like all or nothing mindset. And this is where I have tried to change that. It's it's really like if you put those repetitions, you you work for them in a consistent pace for longer period of time. Like that was a example of what we were talking with. With those ice hockey players with the Italian national team I get, like, it's a example what I was using was mobility exercises, like it's kind of mobility stuff, what almost all hockey players are missing, like they miss mobility from their hips, like do you are skating URC thing, it's for regular people. It's also lack of mobility from your hips, because it's causing, for example, lower back pain. And you might not think that it's coming from hips, so players know that it's important. And mobility is something that you don't need to do a lot you need to do it often. And it's only like a few minutes per day. And I know that many people are telling there are so many things you should be doing test a couple of minutes per day and then when you have a PhD in those kinds of things. You're like, I'm not going to do but for example hockey players, you can build it part of your own workout routine. Like I personally I'm I was a lot more mobile than most of those guys. It was something mobility was something like when I was professionalized with the player myself, I was never doing it I didn't I wasn't aware. I didn't know at the time there was nobody talking about mobility or something now, those guys know everybody's doing everybody's talking about it that when you are busy for example, ice hockey player if you are more more but you get a lot more out from your body. Like if, for example, if your hips are more mobile, you don't need, you can use your full strength to become faster and use the whole range of motion to skate faster. So you don't need even doesn't matter you get stronger, you might get faster. But if you don't get everything out what you already have mobilities helping, but still, most guys don't do it. And now we were doing as a warm up just a few exercises couple of minutes. And guys were telling me that Whoa, they felt so much better from the beginning on the ice, when they went on the ice, like they were already from the minute one. And earlier, they took like 10 to 15 minutes before they were getting that. So mobility, like when you do proper warmup, and some mobility exercises, you are ready to go from the minute one and think what kind of difference this is going to make. Right? If you are prepared you do, let's say differently, you are doing anyway, some kind of warmup. But if you are doing it in the right way, you are able to do you don't need to act more minutes, add more hours to your workouts, but they those guys, they already like let's say that they are still saying our on the ice, but they get 15 minutes more out of it every single day. So guys are they going is like 567 times a week. So that is basically our more quality workout. So without adding anything, it's just doing like working smarter, and not harder. And those are only all habits like if you do it already Anyways, if you change the way what you have been always doing like goes be all we have kind of all those habits would be our we are when we are on our autopilot we do them without thinking. So when you challenge yourself to think like that, why you are doing it, what you are doing, these are all examples, how you are when you are repeating these small kind of habits for longer period of time, how you are able to change kind of everything. So this was this was a best example like my own example is like kind of small habits. When I when I was in my 20s We had I was a hockey player. We had some nutritionist talking, I don't remember anything from that whole lesson. Like they were talking like some boring stuff like always like that, what are carbs and fats and protein and that kind of stuff. And you know, when you have that knowledge already, you think you kind of know that you don't really pay attention. And for me, it was the same. But there was a one thing where I paid attention. And that was we were talking about calories, something and then about sugar. And they were things like what kinds of habits you have every single day. And for me it was I was drinking three cups of coffee every single day. And I still do. And at the time, I was using always super, and putting the phone or soccer every cup of coffee. So it was three teaspoons of soccer every single day. So if one of these bullets are on five grams, so it's 15 grams of soccer more every single day in one day, it's if you think it calorie wise, it's maybe 50 calories. So it's not very significant. But it's still it's still something. But now when I put it like I was counting, it's like over 1000 kilos, like over 100,000 calories, what I have been eating less within a period of 20 years. So this is like it makes in a year. It's seven kilos of super, like 15 grams per day. If you bought it like in 100 days, it's 150 grams. So 300 days, it's half kilo, or no, it's 700 grams or whatever. But anyway, it's now with the maths, not getting all all numbers, right but you get the point that it's coming it's becoming like a if you do it, those more kind of things for a year for 10 years for 20 years. It's making huge impact. And these are like kind of things that I didn't feel like I'm changing I still have my coffee, obviously in the beginning tastes a little bit different. But if you're going to prep let's say you're going to Starbucks or somewhere to crap every time your coffee if you're able to swap it for something else. Just reducing maybe if you get your Starbucks Coffee with 300 calories if you swap it for something else, it's half maybe 100 calories or even better some black coffee without basically anything or with milk only. You are saving so many calories and probably a lot more you don't even need to do to be able to see huge, huge progress and results. So these are kind of habits what you are already doing and why you should always get started more small like it's never feel like that. It's it's those small habits they are like kind of habits what you are repeating what you are able to do in your Reverse does not thinking like the most people are thinking like what you are able to do your best days. But But what is what is what is the power of things what is actually going to be sustainable is those habits what you are able to do also on your worst days. So for example workouts, how to if you are not motivated, let's say that ideally you would do an hour I how I get myself like I'm I'm kind of ashamed to tell explain this, but I'm especially I love working out I hate auto steering thing I'm not basically never enjoy doing then when I get there like I'm I need to have serious conversation with myself. And basically, I convinced myself to get started. So it's either that I'm going to do I'm going to get started with one exercise. And then once it once it that the times that one more, one more. And then I know when I get my when I get myself started, I could go to my fitness room, start my workout, in most cases, I will finish it or maybe I will skip one or two exercises, if time is if I don't have too much time. But goal is never to finish the whole workout is to get is to show up kind of giving vote for yourself that I at least I started if I don't feel like it. I'm not doing it. I allow myself to quit right away. But it's it's its goal is the only goal is to get started and is to show up and give yourself a vote for to becoming a person who is not missing miracles who is not finding bush. It's always like when I talk like with my most successful clients they also tailing basically never skip the workout because if you start to like even you can always find excuses, your mind is very good at finding why not to do it. But if you are able to convince yourself why you should get started. And then it's a whole ladder if you are not able to convince yourself why to get started, then probably your reasons why you are doing it are not strong enough. So but that is another conversation. And by the way, I'm going to start it's going to be soon after this podcast episode is published on August 21. I'm going to start free five, five day sellings fitter you after 35. So I will put it's part of my signature program be sustainable peace. And I will put two if you are joining for wait list at the moment registration page for that silence is not open yet. But if you are on wait list on that piece sustainable peace program, which I will publish on August 28, you will be invited for this challenge. And that's there we are talking more in depth about reasons why you are actually doing this, how to find that kind of deeper motivation, why to do it. So make sure you hit the join for the waitlist and you will be notified with email when everything is done. So it will be in a couple of weeks. Then what is how Ben, you can create a kind of routine how to if you're not motivated. So like the way how other than how most of like people who I who are most consistent, they choose time each day for your workout for your meal preparation or it could be your mind for practice, whatever but you make time for it you it's it's kind of non negotiable appointment with yourself like for me if I if I need to work out it's always in my calendar and there is not going to take some other meetings. It's like a big working meeting with myself that at that time I'm going to work out and that's kind of time when I made sure that I get started. So it's an other task what you could be doing is meal preparation during your mind for practice. But once it's in calendar it you have set the place time when you are going to do it how you're going to do it, it's still you increase those chances that you are actually doing it a lot. So or if you think that I will work out in the evening but then you know you get home from work you are tired something else there's always something happening maybe kids need to get kids from somewhere or or some other working your boss is calling you in a lot mean to you need to work so you will never be able to do it how you want so for me I personally I have a bicycle. I do my workout in the morning so I need to do it as early as possible. And that is there are many, many studies those people who are working out in the morning stay at home most consistently, like later people are working out obviously, this is not for every person, but for most people more consistent people they work out in the morning. So, then there is less chances that something will come. So, this is this is just boarded into your calendar. So, then what is the oddest and when you are losing motivation what is but no most nobody wants to talk about those setbacks. So they are in inevitable so they will always happen at some point. That's the honest truth. And progress isn't always linear. So, instead of beating yourself up over from Mr pout, or having an unplanned seed meal, accept it and move it on, there was a good story about my, one of my coaching clients best example, Sarah was texting me the other day. Now, about like, she has done everything she had planned her meals was everything protein sources, planned and delicious meal for dinner. But for some reason, she ended up eating some kind of cheat meal, but she didn't plan. And the difference was like earlier, she said that she would probably beat herself up. And the next day usually doesn't excuse that now. If you get up on if she when she did bake herself next morning, she gained a lot of weight does she have a lot of carbs, but now she have learned that she accepted it, it's something would happen. So you moved on sitting do anything differently. So you just get back on her normal track started to focus on eating more protein. And if that those kinds of setbacks, if they happen more often, then you probably look better look what why they are happening for what if it if it's once in a while, that's totally normal, it's just move on. And it doesn't say anything. So your birth isn't defined by your mistakes, but your resilience to get back up. So it doesn't matter how many like we feel always guilty, what is the only difference everybody's doing mistakes, everybody has some kind of setup setup setbacks, but the only difference what makes the difference is that how fast you are getting back on it. And the way how you should be what most people are missing is still that you should allow yourself to celebrate your small wins. So, this is something what most people are never doing like we are so good at betting somebody some maybe your friends or your some someone else like if your kids are you have kids, they are playing some sport they are trying hard you are very good at celebrating if you your friend is telling that you know I have accept this and this you are very good at celebrating other people but yourself we are struggling so hard. Like but using as an example like like this what I told earlier about Sarah what happened like it was that was I would I responded for her was that you should actually celebrate because this is a success. Not that you're probably not feeling proud of yourself for having achievement, but to be how you responded that's a time for celebration because that that's a progress that's a progress from the past because the past that everything would lead to guilt and shame overdoing by doing it multiple times multiple days in a row and now you're able to get back on track. And that is that is a progress. So if you are able to choose some time an apple over don't pat yourself on the back. If you were able to do a 10 minute workout despite not feeling it celebrate. So when you when you are having a joy to get from these little victories, they can fall if they really fall your journey can motivate motivation in a good so So allow yourself to eat like for example if you are able to do grow up as like it don't have to be something like like I love to ask always from my clients how they are celebrating like it don't have to be I wish Joshua who I was talking earlier. I remember once I texted him and asked him that you have been in you were able to do all your workouts that's how you are this week that's how you're able to celebrate yourself and he responded me that just bought the pores. Always shipment like that if that's that's your small way to celebrate yourself. That's that's it's getting expensive after every week of doing all workouts you're buying a new car, but for example it can be something like very small like I personally, I love that is the protein shake. So that's my way of celebrating my workout. When I'm getting done. I'm having a DST protests. So it's kind of small way of celebrating my workout having something and but also just it's basically only about recognizing your effort what you're doing like those day to day actions. So this is this is really like what gives you for in a long term a lot more than any motivation when you are allowing yourself in in some way to celebrate and you remember to do it consistently. So wrapping up here, remember that your journey to fitness is your own. So don't compare your progress with others. Like even I used here in some kind of examples. They were not meant to be to comparing myself for somebody else with other brokers. So when you are when you are focusing What matters is that you are better than you were yesterday. So this is this is the only thing that matters. And I know that it's very tempting to compare your progress with somebody else you see in social media, but it really doesn't matter. What matters is that you are better than you were yesterday. Consistency, resilience and self compassion are your best friends on this turn. So that's all for this fitment to a fitness podcast, go to join for my team sustainable peace, the waitlist, I will put a link to show notes and put it in already on your calendar. It will be from Monday, August 21 to Friday five day free challenge. Its times are going to be always 4pm Central European Time it will be 9am in eastern time and talents there will be replaced available so if you can't make it live, there will be replaced available for next week's. So this is the best most transformation not a five day free challenge where you will recall we'll go deeper on all these get yourself Peter after you turn 35 So thank you for listening and talk to you soon.